Tear it up!

Cooking with children - Ah, the joys. Can you hear the sarcasm in my voice? It's not always the most delightful task BUT, it's good for kids to help in the kitchen and they really can be helpful IF you find the right task for them to do.

Usually when I hear the sound of tearing paper, I get nervous that the important check that just came in the mail is being ripped to shreds. Here's an idea for letting them tear and be productive in the kitchen:

Making enchilada casserole? Let your little ones go to town with tearing up the corn tortillas. It kept them busy for 20 minutes and gave them a creative outlet as well. My little guy held up a piece of tortilla shaped like a spire and said, "Mom, a church."

Best of all, they did something that needed to be done and they were happy to do it.

Do you have some creative ways to get children involved in the kitchen? Do share!

More to come, but until then...Stick-to-it!

If you commit...you follow through

So, my 15 year old son committed to bringing peanut butter bars to his school harvest party tomorrow. I come home at 9:30 from an evening out with Dad and no beautiful, delicious peanut butters are on the bar, ready to take to school in the morning; he completely forgot.

"What should we do, Mom?"

Mom's response, "Well, if you commit, you follow through, even if it's 9:30 PM." He promptly got to work. He's proud to take his "creation" to school tomorrow, even if it means staying up until 11:00 to get it done. I'm proud of his good attitude even through the frustration of a deficient memory.

Here's a positive...We get a Midnight snack of to-die-for chocolate frosted peanut butter bars.

More to come, but until then...Stick-to-it!

"How do you do it?"

I have 8 super-duper, fantastic children!! When people find out how many children I have, many times I'm asked, "How do you do it"? My response varies...

• Sometimes I say, "I don't know" because I'm amazed at the capacity I've been blessed with to handle my responsibilities. 
• Other times I respond with, "I take it a day at a time" because when life gets tough, you truly need to look at the day's tasks and not get overwhelmed with everything that's on your plate. 
• "Lots of prayers" is another response. Managing a family of 10 is a daunting task at times, and I need the Lord's help! He's given me my children and he knows what's best for them. I need to ask Him how to handle situations and allow Him to lead me.
• "My husband is awesome". He supports me in all that we do.
• Lately, my response is: "I utilize my older children". I couldn't handle it all if it were not for them. Just recently...

 We're trying to have Family Night, carve pumpkins, make dinner, go over chores, and get to bed at a decent time. Bright idea: have the older kids help the younger kids carve their pumpkins while I make dinner. It was a brilliant plan. Here's an older helping a younger:

Pairing up children builds unity, encourages patience, assists with getting the task at hand accomplished, creates a "buddy system", establishes a role-model/example and teaches age-related lessons to both parties.

Utilize your helpers...boy, does it pay off. We enjoyed a nice dinner of orange chicken/rice, corn, bread and 6 jack o'lanterns smiling on the front porch while I was smiling in the kitchen.

More to come, but until then....Stick-to-it!

He can't do it? Yes, he can!

Years ago, I was at a friend's home visiting. I picked up some garbage on the floor and asked their 2 year old to throw it in the trash can. My friend's response startled me.. "Oh, he doesn't know how to do that." Why doesn't he know? It's simple...he's never been taught.

Children are like sponges; they quickly soak up the information around them. They're eager to learn but we have to teach them the things we want them to know.

There are so many things that little ones can do. Here's an example:

Our little sweetheart likes to push the start button on the dishwasher after we load the dirty dishes. It's a simple thing, but she feels like she's helping and it's a start towards responsibility.

Other job ideas: Clean the doorknobs (sticky and greasy doorknobs are a no-no at our house), empty the trash cans, learn to replace the toilet paper in the bathrooms, replace the kitchen and bathroom towels with fresh ones, bring in the newspaper, be the family messenger, help watch a younger sibling, set the table, or make a bed (even if it's wrinkled and uneven). Young kids are so good at pushing the wet clothes into the dryer or give them a spray bottle and a rag and have them go to town on a dirty floor, appliances or kitchen cupboards.

Our three year old loves to help vacuum with the canister vac and the hose attachment. With supervision of course, he vacuums the stairs and along the baseboards. It keeps him happy, content and BUSY.  I love that!

At a young age, children can fold clothes and put them away. Kitchen towels and washcloths are the best thing to start with!

It may seem like it doesn't matter much if your four year old doesn't have any responsibility, but it will pay off for them and for you when they're older and they really know how to work.

More to come, but until then...Stick-to-it!

Creativity = Motivation

Are you ever tired of nagging your children to help with the chores? Are you feeling overwhelmed with a messy home with not-so-helpful children to assist with the cleanup job? You and your children need some creativity to get motivated! Every few months I pull out the "cooperation scavenger hunt" or "scavenger clean-up race" to get the job done with some fun, competition and of course, a reward at the end. Here's how it's done:

Create a list of 10-15 things that each member of the family needs to do based on what jobs need to be accomplished. Example: Pick up 10 pieces of trash, empty a garbage can, fold 20 items of clothing, make a bed, vacuum a room of the house, empty 10 dishes in the dishwasher, .... get the idea? Give everyone their own list and pencil to cross off the task as it's completed.

Make it a race, or not. Pair up some children (maybe two that haven't been getting along) or do it solo. Create a special prize for the winner and then a treat for all those who participated joyfully. Or, have a family reward at the end. Set a time limit for extra motivation. There's nothing like setting the timer to get children moving more quickly! Here's our family's latest list:

Working together is fun and rewarding. It's much better than doing it by yourself! Add some creativity and it's even better!! Do you have an idea for creative motivation? I'd love to hear it!

More to come, but until then...Stick-to-it!

Want it now? Get it later!

In the ever-growing age of "want-it-now... gotta-have-it now", it's up to us as parents to teach the importance of working towards and saving for a goal, not giving our children what they want with no investment on their part. A few years ago, our 8 year old son (5 years old at the time), wanted a scooter. I told him that if he really wanted a scooter, he could work hard and earn one. We created a chart consisting of squares worth 50 cents per job. The number of squares coincided with the amount of the scooter. Whenever he wanted to do an extra money job he put an X on the square and when all squares were marked, he was given the money to buy his scooter. He recorded his earnings, paid his church donation and then we purchased his scooter.

(Visit www.sticktoitcharts.com/products.html for a money-tracking system that really works!)

It was a fabulous teaching time for him; he was at the wondrous age where children are so curious about money. They have the capacity to understand that items cost money (they just don't show up) and that money has to be earned through hard work, not just taken out of Mom's wallet. He did extra jobs for two months to earn that scooter and after accomplishing his goal, he had such a sweet sense of satisfaction and success. Not only did he enjoy his scooter, he took care of it. He worked so hard to get it...he didn't want anything to happen to it. Something that's hard to acquire is hard to forget.

A few months ago, this same child wanted an alarm clock. He wanted to be like his older siblings. We gave him the same option as the scooter. See his chart below:

 

 Again, he was consistent and diligent and earned his alarm clock. This concept is one that when learned at a young age, will pay off greatly when children are older. With age, the price tag of the desired item becomes greater, and if they expect Mom and Dad to cough up the dough, well, prepare your wallet now. Or, try the want it now, work for it and get it later approach. It works wonders.

More to come, but until then...Stick-to-it!

Report!

I have to credit this blog post to my super-supportive husband. He started the reporting system in our household years ago to teach our children that the job's never done until you've reported back to the one who gave it to you. Whenever he gives our children a task to do, he finishes it with "... and report."

Example: Sam is super helpful at bedtime. Here's something you might hear: "Go get in the shower, pajamas, teeth, prayers and report."

Child: "Dad, reporting."

He's trained our children to do the task and then report back. Not only does he know that the job is complete, but more important, the child feels accountable to someone (Dad), making the likelihood of the assignment really being finished much greater.

So, he's rubbing off on me. The other day I said, "Spencer...get dressed, make your bed, sort the laundry and report." He smiled, did the task, came back and said, "Reporting, Mom". It was awesome!

NOTE: Sometimes it's best to give one task, have the child report and then assign the next, especially when the child is younger. Too many tasks at once can be overwhelming. Plus, I have a few forgetful ones.

Reporting...try it!

More to come, but until then...Stick-to-it!

Consistency...It's the Key!

I've been trying to think of a word that completely describes what parents can do to raise "stick-to-it" kids. Consistency! Let me give an example:

I made 15 bean soup with bread the other night for dinner. My younger children seem to have the tendency to eat the things they want to eat and skip the food that "looks yucky". (My older children were the same way but because of CONSISTENCY, there is no issue with them.) I've learned over the years to give them the "yucky" item first and once that's eaten or at least given a chance, they are given the bread or fruit or whatever it may be. Getting back to dinner...my three year old son didn't want to eat his soup. He wanted bread! I told him after he ate his soup he could have his bread. Of course he fussed about it but I stuck to my guns. I was in the kitchen pouring drinks when I turn around and there is my little boy eating bread, not soup. The sneaky little guy that he is, he snatched a piece of bread when I wasn't looking. Now, here's the moment of truth:  Do you let him keep the bread and say oh well, snicker a bit at how sneaky he is or slightly scold but let him keep it, OR take it away and say he can have it when he finishes or makes a significant effort to eat his soup? I did the latter. Yes, he cried. Yes, it interrupted our dinner time, but I explained that he could have it back after he ate his soup. Guess what....he ate his soup. He sat there nicely and ate bite after bite until it was gone and then he asked for his bread of which I was more than happy to give him.

The bread is not the issue. Obedience is the issue. Training your child to follow instructions is the issue. Next time, he'll know he can't have his bread until his soup's gone and more importantly, that I WON'T CAVE OR GIVE IN, that I'll be CONSISTENT, and the battle will not be as tough as it was the first time. Over time, it will be easier until it is no longer an issue. This principle can be applied to any aspect of parenting.

It may seem like a small thing, but it trains the child to be obedient, which is the first step to responsibility, dependability, honesty, reliability...basically, being a "stick-to-it" child. Your consistency as a parent, if used properly, will bear children who are consistent. What a fabulous notion!

More to come...but until then, Stick-to-it!