Crime and Punishment

One example of a crime and the punishment...

A few months ago I was at the dentist for a checkup and cleaning. Definitely not my favorite thing in the world, but I do like how my teeth feel afterward. Our ENTIRE family was at the dentist that day for the same reason. As you can imagine, it caused some heads to turn and questions to be asked. The dental assistant asked me, "So, how many children do you have?" I replied, "4 boys and 4 girls". It tends to minimize the reaction to say it that way, rather than, "EIGHT!" He proceeded to tell me about the big family he grew up in. We talked a bit about children and discipline and training. He then told me a story I will never forget!

He grew up in a rural town in Idaho. When he was six years old, his mother went "to town" for the monthly shopping trip. He said she was usually gone for about four hours. His sixteen year old brother was in charge of watching him and the rest of the family. His six year old self was probably a bit annoying or bossy or a pain in the neck. As a result, the brother locked him in their fruit room in the basement. No light or window was available; it was pitch black. He cried and screamed and knocked on the door. The brother never let him out.

When the mother came home, she found out what had happened. I'm not sure if she found him in the fruit room as she was putting the groceries away or if she asked where he was. That part of the story is unclear. However, when the tragedy was discovered, obviously she was furious. Can you imagine how frightened that little boy must have been? BUT, they didn't ground the older son. They didn't make him clean the garage or scrub all the bathrooms. The punishment was AMAZING!

For one year the older son had to take the younger son with him EVERYWHERE he went, except to school. If the teenager was going to a party, the younger boy went, too. If he was going to a movie, little brother got to tag along. 

Boy: "But Mom, that movie isn't appropriate for 'Mikey' to see". 
Mom: "I guess you're not going to that movie then".

Boy: "Can I go to Jimmy's house?" 
Mom: "You have to take your little brother with you."

This lasted for ONE YEAR!!! I was incredulous when he told me. 

"He really took you everywhere with him for one year?"

The dental assistant told me the rest of the story...
The older and younger brother became best friends. He is his favorite brother now. The "punishment" that was given ended up being a blessing for both brothers. What began as a very negative experience became a lesson of love and forgiveness. What inspired parents to turn this scenario into a positive blessing for their family!

If one of my children did this, I would be livid. I don't know if I would be calm enough to come up with such wisdom. Not one of my children has ever done something so serious. However, if a warranted situation does arise, I'll have this little gem in the back of my mind. 

I could see myself implementing this idea for a day or a week for situations that fit the bill. Non-loyalty or harmful behavior to siblings does not bode well in our family. Walk that line and you'll be walking with little brother or sister in tow. 

Soldier Hollow Weekend - More to Come About That Amazing Trip!

It is up to parents to formulate tactics that will shape and mold the children they've been given responsibility for. I am grateful to hear experiences of other parents. It gives me new ideas and methods to try with my family. What a blessing to have examples around us whom help us stick-to-it!

I told this story to my children...what the older boy did AND the punishment. They looked at me with disbelief. I'm not sure if they were shocked about the crime or the punishment. Let's just say, I don't think any of them want such a consequence. Great...I don't want to give it either!

More to Come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

Analogy: Crayons, Choices, and Children

"Mom, come quickly. Look what she did!" 

Black crayon scribbled all over the coffee table.

GASP (from me)

Eyes full of  sorrow looked up at mine. 

No, I wasn't mad. But, I wasn't going to let a teaching lesson go by.

Get out the Magic Eraser. Wait, I don't have a Magic Eraser.

Baby Wipes.

Well, it's not the first time I've dealt with a child scribbling crayon all over something, whether it be the wall or the couch or the table, or my Messiah score. At least crayon comes out, not like the "pretend boyfriend" one of my daughters drew in permanent Sharpie on the bedroom wall years ago. 

After seeing the mess she made and being so proud of myself for not raising my voice or getting upset, I quickly told her that it's unacceptable to make a mess of our home and she needed to clean it up. Remembering that the Magic Eraser was used up with some spring cleaning a few weeks ago, I resorted to the baby wipes. I gave her a handful and told her to go to town on scrubbing that table clean. She knew not to complain. She got busy. (Sometimes I think they like cleaning up the mess - to a point - especially if it involves scrubbing.)

No, I don't clean my house or make sure my children look perfect before I take their pictures. This is Bushman Family Reality!

Almost immediately, older brother jumped in to help.That's my scout - doing a good turn!

Many Hands make the Job Light

 
After 20 minutes or so she asked me to come and look at her progress. Pretty good, especially for a 4 year old. There were a few places she missed that I pointed out. She started to complain a bit, "It's too hard, Mommy." There it was...the words that sink into your heart when a child has done her best and is feeling the effects of fatigue and remorse. I took the wipe from her and started scrubbing for her. She placed her hand on mine and we scrubbed the last of it together. She felt happy, with a sense of accomplishment for fixing what she had done.

...take me by the hand...

As we finished up, I suddenly had a spiritual moment...

We all make mistakes in life, like scribbling on the table.  If we leave it alone and don't try to clean it up or make it right, it stays there for all to see, or maybe just for us to see, reminding us of the mistake. Those reminders make us feel guilt or sorrow or sadness. We look at the mess and think, "I don't know how to get rid of it. It's too hard." That's where the Savior comes in. He helps us get rid of the mess, standing by us, strengthening and encouraging as we follow his road map to repentance. (Brother Scout) As we follow it, and do ALL WE CAN, he takes our hand and helps us finish on the path (Mom). He forgives us and remembers our mistakes no more. Best of all, he takes away the guilt and the sorrow and the sadness. He cleanses us and comforts us, which enables us to feel joy. He makes it right.

It's interesting what happens when we follow the Lord's plan of parenting. The pattern is set in the scriptures, and it's up to us to study and learn and practice. We both learned a lesson that day. She learned the consequence of scribbling on the table - being accountable to clean it up, apologize, and do all she can to make it right. I also hope she realized and felt the support from those who love her.  I learned that parenting brings joyful lessons and spiritual moments, thus the Analogy of Crayons, Choices, and Children.
 
More to Come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

The Learning Experience

Just cover it up with a paper towel...nobody will notice!

My two boys were babysitting the other night and did a fabulous job! However, the next morning, I found this on the floor in the kitchen...

Suspicious paper towel with an odd-looking stain on it

I picked up the paper towel and found this:

Brown, messy piles always have me concerned

I immediately smelled the brown disaster; phew, smells like chocolate. I decided to wait for my sons to wake up to get their take on how this lovely, mystery mess ended up on the kitchen floor.

Once they staggered out of bed, I directed them to the paper towel. They immediately smiled and acted innocent. "Give me the drill", I quickly exclaimed. By the way, that's not a question.

Here's the drill...

Boys: "We were getting ice cream for everyone but we didn't have any hot fudge. We didn't want to make any so we decided to melt chocolate chips in the microwave. The chocolate chips started smoking..."

Me: "Stop, stop. How long did you set the microwave for?"

Boys: "One minute."

FIRST LEARNING EXPERIENCE

Me: "For next time, when you melt something like this in the microwave, you set it for a short time - 15 seconds or so, stir it, and then repeat until it's melted to desired consistency."

Boys: "OK - so it was smoking and we had to open all the doors. Then, the chocolate was so hot and messy and we didn't want to put it in the garbage, so we decided to pour it in a ziploc bag."

WOW! SECOND LEARNING EXPERIENCE

Older Boy: "The hot, burned chocolate melted the bag and it all fell on the floor."

They didn't need me to tell them that this was a bad idea. They learned, from experience.

Older Boy: "I told him to clean it up (Pointing to his younger brother) but he didn't."

Younger Boy: "No, I told you to clean it up. I was putting the ice cream away."

I laughed. It's easy to laugh when you're not in the heat of the moment. That's why I like addressing the problems when some time has passed and I'm not so fired up about it. 

I don't know how the paper towel made it on top to hide the catastrophe, but nevertheless, they were quickly given instructions to clean it up.

Once the mess was taken care of, we talked about their "Learning Experience". They realized what went wrong and next time, I think they'll both be smart enough to avoid the chaos altogether. How else do we learn, but by experience?

I'm glad they didn't clean it up before I got home. I probably wouldn't have heard about it and they would have missed out on some helpful tips and positive instruction.

So, thank you boys for giving me a good laugh, and for letting me be part of "The Learning Experience."

More to Come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

EEEEEEEEa-sy?

"Summertime........and the livin' is EEEEEEEa-sy"

George Gershwin - Porgy and Bess

This is the first song that comes to mind when I think of the word, summer. My amazing, opera-singing friend sang this in our Gershwin Review in high school. Her gorgeous voice goes through my mind as I think of the lyrics to this song. But alas, I highly disagree with the premise of this classic, for summertime for me is not an EEEEEEEEa-sy time of year.

I've explained it before...so I won't explain it again. But, you can read up on my summertime philosophy, here: Turn "What Can I do" into Summertime Service

Being a full time, working mother at home, it's not an EEEEEEEEa-sy thing for me to keep up with all the activities that my children want to do OR the tasks that need to be accomplished.

So, I have assigned responsibilities to my children to help take the load off...

School Time - This is an important part of summer for us, because learning does not go on hold for three months. Thus, to make my life more EEEEEEEA-sy, I enlist the help of my older children to tutor my younger kids in math, reading, writing, etc. 

My eleven year old is taking it easy, lying on the couch, as he helps Buddy-Boy with his math.

Meal Time - Summertime brings more time than normal, so let's be productive, helpful, and learn while we're at it! Assigning the responsibility of making dinner to my children is the best thing for making my life EEEEEEEa-sy.

Lovely Ladies in their Aprons

Fun Time - With my current circumstances, I can't be the one to always take the children out for an activity. So, again, enlist my big kids to do fun things with the younger children.

Kidnapping Brother on his birthday for an afternoon out. (Little sister was scared as they were tying him up)

ZEBRAS!!!!!

I love not having to go in the pool every time!

Yard Time - Trying to get the yard together is a formidable task. It's definitely not EEEEEEEE-asy! Have everyone pitch in!

Thanks to these great kids for making our summer a bit more EEEEEEEa-sy. We still have lots of fun family time!

Planet Play

Dance Party: "Eat-it!"

Lovin' this cute foal!

Patience and a smile for the Mare

Cousins AND the Easter Bunny

Good times with "The Bear"

If you don't understand the EEEEEEEa-sy reference, you just need to listen to the song. Hopefully, you'll find a way to make your summer a little more EEEEEEEEa-sy, too!

More to Come....but until then, Stick-to-it!

The "mean Mom"

I'm a mean Mom. I am, and I'm happy and proud to admit it. Hopefully, you understand what I'm saying...I love my children, I'm kind to them, I read them stories, I sneak them treats, I take care of all their needs, I do special things for them, I listen to their news and tales, I pray for them, I teach them and train them. But, sometimes you just have to be "the mean Mom" to teach a lesson, show the importance of obeying the rules, to set standards and expectations; all this to raise "stick-to-it" kids. I believe in holding my children accountable for their choices, for there are consequences for disobeying or disrespecting. You're not home on time? I'm tracking you down. You have a C- in Math? You're staying home this weekend to finish your math lessons. You want to play a video game? No, too much media today. You didn't clean your room? Sorry, you'll have to play with your friend another day.

My children don't say I'm mean anymore. Years ago, if they did happen to say "You're so mean", I'd say, "You're right...don't forget it!" Since they know it doesn't phase me, it is not in their vocabulary. Hopefully, one day they'll understand that it's not mean, but love. I hope they'll become a "mean Mom" or "mean Dad" to their children, too.

A few weeks back, my children wanted to play with their cousins. I told them if they worked hard on their chores that morning, we'd see if they could come over. My two middle boys goofed off all morning long. After repeated reminders, they still did not take care of their responsibilities. So, I called off the play time with their cousins. They balked and complained - they even said they would do the work. However, I had to "stick-to-it" and be the "mean Mom". Thankfully, they've been a lot better about doing their jobs because of the consequence inflicted from not doing them before.

Look for ways to truly train, teach and LOVE - by being the "mean Mom".

More to come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

Money Matters

The government's fiscal irresponsibility is a very frustrating thing to me. What message is this sending to our children? "Oh....we can spend whatever we want with no accountability." No! In "Real Life", you'll be in a fast financial nightmare which will negatively affect the rest of your life. My son is almost twelve, yet he understands the problem. He recently wrote a letter to our congressman as one of the requirements for the Citizenship in the Community merit badge...

Dear Congressman Matheson,

I have recently found out that the government is in a lot of debt to China. If we don’t get this resolved then we will be in big trouble if China calls in their loan. I am asking you to help the government to stop buying too many things so we can try to pay off our loan as fast as possible. I just want to know if we don’t pay our loan, what is going to happen to us as a country?

I am learning how to manage my own money. If I can’t spend more than I have, why can the government? Our leaders should be an example to the children of our country. The leaders we have aren’t doing a very good job at this.

The second thing I want to talk to you about is to get the government to reduce taxes. Many people are living on the street because they can’t pay their taxes. My family has a hard time paying our bills because we have too high of taxes. I am also asking you to help the government think about this problem and get it resolved. 

It is our responsibility as parents to teach our children about fiscal responsibility. One of the first steps is to make sure they have money to work with as they learn. But, do we just hand it over to them with "no strings attached"? I don't think so. I believe in an allowance based on hard work and responsibility. Yes, they can earn money by doing extra jobs around the house. Help them see that money comes from hard work - not from Mom's and Dad's wallet. Items are not purchased by swiping a plastic card through a machine and pressing a few buttons. 

A few weeks ago, my nine year old son asked if he could earn some extra money by doing "money jobs". Money jobs are additional tasks the children can do outside of the chores that are expected as part of a family. Sure - clean out the garage...

I love the roller blade look! Why not have fun while you're working??

I was so impressed with the job he did! Do a fabulous and thorough job and get a little tip for the extra efforts! When he got paid the next day, he got out his Stick-to-it Money Management System:

 

Earning is the first step. Don't forget the importance of giving, saving and then spending. Just like most things, start them young and see their consistency and enthusiasm shine as they grow in years and experience. Move over, Ben Bernanke. I have some children who understand fiscal responsibility.
 

More to Come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

Lessons from a Googly Eye

No matter how many times you tell your children not to do something (or to do something), sometimes they just have to do it (or not do it) and suffer the consequences to REALLY learn. I find, as a mother, that too many times I want to save my children from these consequences, but they end up missing the lesson they so need! 

My 6 year old daughter on Tuesday night: "Mom, something flew in my ear...really, I was lying in bed and I felt something go in my ear. I think it was maybe a googly eye or something." 

Great! How many times have I told her never to put anything in her nose or ear? I look in there with my otoscope (what would I do without that?), and sure enough, there's a googly eye stuck in the ear canal.

She insisted that she didn't know how it got there. (And I was born yesterday) I wouldn't let her get away with naivety nor get out of any consequences. After fifteen minutes of talking with her, she confessed to putting it in her ear. We told her that it would cost a lot of money to take her to the doctor to get it removed. 

Consequence: being scared all night with a googly eye stuck in her ear (we had to wait until morning), going to the doctor which no child likes (well, maybe to her it was exciting), suffering humiliation through the teasings of her older siblings (she didn't want to tell them - too late, I already did), and doing extra jobs around the house to help pay for the doctor's bill. Hopefully, this experience will teach her to NEVER do this again. Side note: the doctor asked us if we wanted the googly eye back for a souvenir. Are you kidding? Throw that thing away - we don't want to take any chances of it making it back in her ear.

My nine year old son: He came home last week with his report card. He was disappointed in himself because he received a B in reading. He's supposed to read twenty minutes each day and get his reading bookmark signed off by a parent. I got tired of playing reading nazi; reminding him every night, putting my foot down to DO YOUR READING NOW!!!, fighting him to do the reading routine each evening. I decided to let him govern himself and let it go. That's not my style! I believe in reminding my children about their responsibilities. They need guidance and direction and help. We all do. Sometimes, though, they need to suffer the consequence.

Consequence: Getting a B, instead of an A and feeling badly for not doing his best. The positive is he told me, "I'm going to do my reading every night so I get an A in reading next term." Yes!! I love that kind of motivation. Hopefully, it really "sticks"!

We've had our fair share of beads, BBs, lettuce and raisins up the nose. All of us can tell a story about our children making mistakes and doing dumb things. Be grateful for the lessons they learn...and then prepare for more stupid stuff down the road.

More to come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

Stick-to-it Chart Philosophy: A tool, just like your fingernail clippers

Tool: anything used as a means of accomplishing a task or purpose (www.dictionary.com) 

I believe in tools. I believe in using my Bosch to mix my pumpkin cake batter (even though I don't want to make any more pumpkin cake for a long time!!) I'm not always grateful, but I should be, for my alarm clock which acts as a tool to wake me up on time. I use my cell phone as a tool of communication. My washing machine and dryer are tools for acquiring clean clothes. (I won't mention that we probably have too many clothes because we have them) The finger nail clippers are a tool to help me cut my family's nails. (Reminder to cut my children's nails!!) My computer is the ultimate tool for accomplishing everything under the sun (at least it seems that way).

What good are these tools if we don't pick them up and use them? They are not tools unless we utilize them to be so. The clothes are not going to be clean if we don't put the clothes in, add the detergent and start the machine. The camera is not going to take pictures if one does not turn it on and push the button. The children's hair will not be cut if the scissors or clippers just sit on the counter.

The purpose of this post? The Stick-to-it Chart Philosophy...

Charts are a tool...a means of accomplishing a task or purpose. Need some extra motivation to help your children accomplish their school work? A chart is a great way to help with that. However, it's a tool. If you don't use the tool, it's not going to help accomplish the task. If you just give the chart to your child and expect it to be the hands-off solution for Mom but the ultimate solution for Charlie, you've missed the opportunity and it WILL NOT WORK. That can be likened to giving the fingernail clippers to your two year old and expecting them to be neatly trimmed when Mom inspects at the end of the day. (Wow, wouldn't that be nice??) 

I've heard many mothers say that charts do not work for them. They don't work if you're not involved. They don't work if you don't pick them up and use them, just as you would any other tool in your home. They don't work if you don't remind your child to use it or don't encourage them to

accomplish the desired goal. Yes, all children are different. Not every child will be encouraged and motivated by a chart. However, if the parent is not involved then there is no chance for it to be successful.

If you've been turned off by using charts in your home, give it a try. However, think of it as a tool for accomplishing your task or purpose with parental involvement. Great things really will come to pass when these tools are utilized with the proper perspective.

Look for a new chart product, coming out for November...This one, if implemented with parental perspective, will truly transform your home!!

More to Come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

Learning from a "Mean Mama"

In our home, we get many requests by our teenagers to do things with their friends, especially on the weekend. We try to accommodate as much as possible; they do so much to help out at home. It is not uncommon for our teenagers to be babysitting or running errands or doing chores, etc. Just because they're busy teenagers doesn't mean that they get out of household responsibilities, for they're part of our home and family, too. But I digress...

Back to requests with friends. I've had many conversations with other mothers about a curfew. How do you handle the curfew issue? When is your child's curfew? What is your punishment for breaking curfew? Etc. Etc. We found an answer to our family's needs after talking with a friend of mine (She's one of those "mean Mama's") who is about five years ahead of us. They don't believe in a "curfew" as the world generally defines it. They don't tell their children, "Your curfew is 11PM every night - do whatever you want but you have to be home by 11." No, no. They define the curfew each time the child sets foot out the door. They hear about the event and ask, "When are you going to be home?" If their timing is reasonable, they go for it. If not, they discuss it and come to an agreement. 

I love this and we've implemented it in our home. Here are some examples:

It's prom night. My child wants to go to dinner, go to the dance and have ice cream at so and so's home until 1 AM. Sure...it's a very special occasion, there is structure and purpose. Great - see you at 1 AM, but, you better be home at 1:00!!

Speaking of Prom Night...

It's a Saturday night. Some friends want to go to a movie and out for a hamburger. They leave at 6:30 PM. Movie and a hamburger is a three to four hour event, depending on details. So, having a curfew that day of Midnight or 1 AM is ridiculous. Too much time for trouble and possible no good. Be home at 10:30? Perfect!


Last night, my oldest son helped out with the little people while Mom and all the older kids were gone. He had some plans with friends that he put off to help his Dad. At 9:00 he left and asked if he could be home at 11:30. Sure - thanks for all of your help and hard work! Have Fun!!!

Give us the details of your event and come up with a realistic time to be home. Approve it with Mom and Dad and be home on time. Have Fun! It's a great plan. We know where they are, they know when to be home, we feel comfortable with the time frame and the plans...they feel like they're making the decision about when is realistic to be home.

Definition of a "Mean Mama": I'll save that for another day. But if you're not home on time, I'm out looking for you...

More to Come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

Make Sure it's Worth it!!

Does the entertainment industry just drive you crazy? When your children want to go see a movie with their friends, do you cringe because you know there's not going to be ANYTHING good enough to see? Yes, there is the rare "great film" that comes out, but most of them are not worth my time, nor my money. 

I've learned to rely on this website to help me with my movie-viewing decisions:

http://www.pluggedin.com/ developed by Focus on the Family - www.family.org 

Choose a movie - a new release or an older film and it gives you the DETAILS so you may make an informed decision about whether or not to see the movie, not just rely on your neighbor or friend that said, "It's so great" or "It doesn't really have any swearing" or "There's just a little bit of violence". 

It gives you positive elements, negative elements, sexual content, violent content, drug/alcohol content, crude/profane language and other elements. It tells you how many instances of a swear word there are, quotes from the movie, and descriptions of inappropriate scenes; followed up by an "opinion" as to whether or not to spend your money or time.

I use this website often. I've used it so much that my children now go to the website and read the review before they ask if they can go see it. Or, they email me the review so I can read it myself. 

With my older two children, we've moved to a different approach. We want them to make the decisions for themselves...it's not much longer before they're on their own and we want them to have practice making choices with guidance from those who love them. We tell them to read the review. If they feel good about it, then we let them make the choice. However, we've put our foot down with Rated R movies - not allowed! It's worked well.

My son wanted to go see Avatar. He read the review. I asked him, "What do you think?" He said, "I don't think I should see it. I'll suggest something different". They didn't see a movie after all. They participated in another activity which I would much prefer. 

Help your children choose their media wisely! Find great movies or a TV series to watch as a family and to find enjoyment in. The latest series we've been enjoying is Sue Thomas, F.B.Eye. It's about a deaf lady who works for the FBI, solving cases using her lip reading ability. It's fabulous! No swearing, no sexuality. It's funny and entertaining and exciting. 

Purchase it from AFA: http://store.afa.net/p-10000558-sue-thomas-fbeye-complete-5-volume-set.aspx

Learn more about the true story of Sue Thomas:

 http://suethomasfbeye.com/default.aspx

My movie philosophy: If you're going to watch it, make sure it's worth it.

More to come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

"The Form"

Before I even begin, let me just say, "I love my teenagers!" They are delightful, fun, enjoyable and amazing people. They just need guidance, love, boundaries, discussions, reasoning, time, trust, and more, much more.

 In our home, we don't believe in our children leaving without knowing where they're going, who they're going to be with, when they'll be home, etc, etc. In guiding our children towards increased responsibility, my husband introduced "The Form".

"The Form" was created by our teenagers and Dad. It is a list of questions that need to be answered before we give the OK for a particular event; questions like: "Who is driving?", "How much money will it cost?", "Who is going?", "Where will it take place?". Let me tell you now, my teenagers were not excited about this, but they know their Dad, and he's very lenient when you're responsible, thorough, self-governed and helpful, so they went along.

At first it seemed kind of goofy, but "The Form" has accomplished many things...

1. When a child asks if they can do something, they know we're going to say "Where's the form". They've learned to figure out all the questions before asking if they can do something. It has taught them to gather the information and present it in a logical fashion.

2. Our children have their events well planned; no more last minute phone calls from the movie theater such as, "Can you pick us up". They are more organized and thus, their events go more smoothly.

3. As parents, we have all of the information we need to make an informed decision.  I don't want my children going to a movie if I don't know what they're going to see. (Now, more than ever, is this vital!)

4. We know what our children are doing! We feel comfortable with who they are with and where they are going. We're "in the know" and I love it.

FYI - "The Form" isn't always a physical piece of paper. Sometimes it's an email or an oral explanation, but the key components are there for us to make our decision and for our children to have a fantastic time.

No, our children have not given us "The Form" when Mom and Dad go out together. I'm sure it's just a matter of time...

More to come, but until then...Stick-to-it!

Make it a Game

I'm behind on sock matching. Sound Familiar? Right now my unmatched sock container is a huge rubbermaid bucket, you know, one you would store your children's outgrown clothes in. Yes, that's how many unmatched socks we have right now. Of course, today, my 3 year old son decided to dump the socks all over my bedroom floor. Here's the moment of truth. Do I:
1. Get upset and tell him to clean them up (which most likely will not get accomplished)
2. Get upset when he doesn't clean them up and do it myself.
3. Make it a game and see what happens.

This is what we did...

First of all, he loves basketball (yes, he has three older brothers). I told him, "Let's shoot them into the bucket and see how many points we can make". He immediately got into it. He grabbed handfulls of socks and threw them into the "hoop". With every shot we'd say "two points" or "three points". We even got into some slam-dunking.

It took three minutes to clean up. He had fun doing it but it instilled in him the concept of "if you make a mess, you clean it up." I had fun as well, and  I didn't lose my cool.
Hey, I didn't realize I was so good at "basketball"!

More to come, but until then...Stick-to-it!