Crime and Punishment

One example of a crime and the punishment...

A few months ago I was at the dentist for a checkup and cleaning. Definitely not my favorite thing in the world, but I do like how my teeth feel afterward. Our ENTIRE family was at the dentist that day for the same reason. As you can imagine, it caused some heads to turn and questions to be asked. The dental assistant asked me, "So, how many children do you have?" I replied, "4 boys and 4 girls". It tends to minimize the reaction to say it that way, rather than, "EIGHT!" He proceeded to tell me about the big family he grew up in. We talked a bit about children and discipline and training. He then told me a story I will never forget!

He grew up in a rural town in Idaho. When he was six years old, his mother went "to town" for the monthly shopping trip. He said she was usually gone for about four hours. His sixteen year old brother was in charge of watching him and the rest of the family. His six year old self was probably a bit annoying or bossy or a pain in the neck. As a result, the brother locked him in their fruit room in the basement. No light or window was available; it was pitch black. He cried and screamed and knocked on the door. The brother never let him out.

When the mother came home, she found out what had happened. I'm not sure if she found him in the fruit room as she was putting the groceries away or if she asked where he was. That part of the story is unclear. However, when the tragedy was discovered, obviously she was furious. Can you imagine how frightened that little boy must have been? BUT, they didn't ground the older son. They didn't make him clean the garage or scrub all the bathrooms. The punishment was AMAZING!

For one year the older son had to take the younger son with him EVERYWHERE he went, except to school. If the teenager was going to a party, the younger boy went, too. If he was going to a movie, little brother got to tag along. 

Boy: "But Mom, that movie isn't appropriate for 'Mikey' to see". 
Mom: "I guess you're not going to that movie then".

Boy: "Can I go to Jimmy's house?" 
Mom: "You have to take your little brother with you."

This lasted for ONE YEAR!!! I was incredulous when he told me. 

"He really took you everywhere with him for one year?"

The dental assistant told me the rest of the story...
The older and younger brother became best friends. He is his favorite brother now. The "punishment" that was given ended up being a blessing for both brothers. What began as a very negative experience became a lesson of love and forgiveness. What inspired parents to turn this scenario into a positive blessing for their family!

If one of my children did this, I would be livid. I don't know if I would be calm enough to come up with such wisdom. Not one of my children has ever done something so serious. However, if a warranted situation does arise, I'll have this little gem in the back of my mind. 

I could see myself implementing this idea for a day or a week for situations that fit the bill. Non-loyalty or harmful behavior to siblings does not bode well in our family. Walk that line and you'll be walking with little brother or sister in tow. 

Soldier Hollow Weekend - More to Come About That Amazing Trip!

It is up to parents to formulate tactics that will shape and mold the children they've been given responsibility for. I am grateful to hear experiences of other parents. It gives me new ideas and methods to try with my family. What a blessing to have examples around us whom help us stick-to-it!

I told this story to my children...what the older boy did AND the punishment. They looked at me with disbelief. I'm not sure if they were shocked about the crime or the punishment. Let's just say, I don't think any of them want such a consequence. Great...I don't want to give it either!

More to Come...but until then, Stick-to-it!