A Family Day with Malts on Top

"Yes, I really, really want to play...

But Mom's declared it a "Family Day".

A friend of mine used to live in a neighborhood full of children. She became frustrated one day with the distractions caused by the doorbell ringing all day long when her children were supposed to be doing their chores or school work. She decided then and there to put up a sign each day that declared, "Family Day" or "Friend Day". If it was a Family Day, the neighbor kids passed by and didn't stop to chat or ring. If it was a Friend Day, they knew they could come by to play.

I've never gone as far as putting out a sign, but periodically I do declare a Family Day; and when Mom declares, she means business. Even if a friend comes by to play, the children say, "Sorry, it's a Family Day." If one of my children is invited to do something, again, "I really, really want to play, but Mom's declared it a Family Day". No, they don't recite my little poem, but I've trained them to understand the importance of a Family Day.

I don't pull out this card very often...in fact, it's really been a few months since the last declaration. I do it when I feel there is utter chaos in the house, when we're planning for something big, when I need "ALL HANDS ON DECK" to accomplish a major task, when packing and preparing for a vacation, for a huge family project, or something of the sort. 

Yes, you got it right. Today is a "Family Day" and boy, do I have plans. Everyone has their regular set of chores to accomplish, after which they're given a list of extra assignments to do. This is also a NO MEDIA day...no iPad, movies, or computer time. Although, music is a necessity! Fun, happy music always makes people work faster and better. Playing or "hanging out" with friends is not allowed on this day. Although, if it happens to fall on a day with a church activity, they can definitely attend. I really try to plan a Family Day when there are no prior commitments or activities so the children do not miss out on something they've been looking forward to. Announcing Family Day in advance is an important part to a successful day. They are notified in advance, they're prepared for it, and they can plan their schedules around it. The importance of explaining why it's a Family Day is vital as well. If they understand WHY, they're more likely to DO. 

I try to round out Family Day with something to look forward to at the end, depending on the purpose. Today, it may just be homemade, hot fudge malts since time is limited.

Hot fudge malts are our family's favorite. Here's the recipe for your next family treat:

Hot Fudge Malts

 

Fill your blender 2/3 full with GOOD ice cream – Kirkland vanilla is the best!

Add 3 T malt powder

Add ½ t. vanilla

Add 3/4 cup hot fudge (see recipe below)

Add enough whole milk to cover the ice cream mixture.

Blend well.  Add more milk if a thinner consistency is desired.  Pour into glasses and top with whipped cream.

Hot Fudge:

3 cubes butter

3 cups sugar

1 ½ cups semi-sweet chocolate chips

1 12 oz. can evaporated milk

1 t. vanilla

Combine top 4 ingredients in sauce pan and cook on medium heat, stirring constantly, until mixture comes to a boil.  Let boil for one minute while stirring.

Take off heat and add vanilla.  It thickens as it cools.  Store in freezer for up to 2 months or in refrigerator for 2 weeks. 

So, Mom (or Dad), if you're feeling frazzled, declare a Family Day. It will be a life saver!!

More to Come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

PLEASE, COME HOME!!

Bring her home....Bring her home.....Bring her home!

Les Miserables (with a tweak)

Do you have a certain child that seems to be your right hand man; a child that is always in the right place at the right time, that knows the needs of the home, and accomplishes tasks without being asked? This child isn't always the same individual. At our home, this person tends to rotate year to year depending on schedule, availability, mood, emotional status, and personality changes. 

Right now, it's our EE! She's at Girl's Camp all week long so we are all feeling the pain of her absence. It's not just because of what she DOES at home, but who she IS.

She's a breath of fresh air!

She always enjoys a party!

She's willing to be involved and try new things!

She's diligent and organized!

 

She's Helpful...

...and She's Helpful!

She's an amazing friend!

She's a gentle and sweet sister!

She is grateful for amazing opportunities!

She's oh, so talented!

She LOVES to have fun!

She sets an example for her siblings and cousins!

She's Darling and Amazing!

We love you and miss you. Come home...our family is not complete without you!!

More to Come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

Laugh your way through the Booby Trap

“The only way to get through life is to laugh your way through it. 

You either have to laugh or cry. I prefer to laugh. Crying gives me a headache.” 

 Marjorie Pay Hinckley

I took this advice last night when I went to the kitchen sink to get my last drink for the night. My son was asking me some questions and standing right by me. I turned on the faucet and water started spraying both of us. Quickly turning off the faucet, I tried to make sense of what had happened. The source of the spray was the sprayer, with elastics tied tightly around the button, engaging it for an attack on the innocent victim. I fell into a booby trap! 

Yes, I was quite startled. In fact, for a moment, I was rather annoyed. Then my son started laughing. Then I started laughing, not because I was drenched, but because he had created the booby trap and he got trapped by his own contraption! It was meant for someone else (probably me), but he fell victim, too. 

I love the above quote by Marjorie Hinckley. It's so true - crying does give you a headache. So laugh about it instead of crying or getting angry or upset. A moment like the faucet could have gone sour in a hurry. Instead, it will be a memory for a lifetime. Oh, and two can play that game! Look out, buddy...I just might burst your bubble!

More to come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

I'm Bald - New Family Photo

I was holding my youngest near the family photo on the wall. 

She pointed to herself and declared, "Look, I'm a baby and I'm bald." 

Time for an updated family photo!

Every few years that time rolls around. I tend to stress about it 'cause I want it to be just right. We don't update our family pics every six months or every year. So, when the 2 year mark hits, I start imagining the locale, the clothes, the formations, the color scheme, etc. Thanks to my amazing friend and photographer, she makes it easy and comfortable and casual. She even finds the right place! However, I still have to decide on what everybody wears and with ten people, that's not an easy task.

I usually start out by looking at the wardrobe of each person in the family (our wardrobes are not that extensive!). What colors do the majority of the people have so I don't need to go out and purchase a new outfit for everyone. That gets pricey in a hurry! Next, I think, "If I do need to purchase, what items is so and so low on that she could really use?" I hit the clearance and sale racks to find inexpensive adds, searching for little accessories or extras to give the right touch. 

Help, I just can't find this or that. Solution: Borrow! This time around, I could not find something to wear for yours truly. I thought of a good friend of mine who has a dress that would match perfectly for the photo session. She was most gracious (pneumonia and all) when I called her (interrupting her son's birthday party) to beg for the use of her dress for an afternoon. Luckily, we're about the same size (well, I don't know that either of us would say it's lucky...we'd rather be a size 6!).  Oh, good friends...always there when you need them!

Once the clothes are found and the outfits coordinated, Mom can relax until the day of. Once that day comes, be sure there is enough time to get everyone ready without stress. Stress is a mood killer and an interrupter of quality family time. I was proud of myself! I put everything else aside two hours before we needed to leave. I assigned the little girls to the big girls for hair and primping. The little boy was assigned to a big boy for hair and last minute needs. I got ready in plenty of time and even prepared snacks to bring along to distract the grumps. 

On the way to the photo shoot, Mom gives her usual lecture about cheerfulness and cooperation. "If everyone quickly smiles, stands where they're told, puts their hands and feet in position, tilts their head, and is happy, the experience will be much faster...and, if we're fast, we'll have enough time to stop for ice cream afterward." It worked! Our youngest had one little fuss, but I whipped out the snacks and she was immediately happy. Note that all of our children can be reasoned with (or bribed) as we don't have any under two anymore. In less than two hours, we were finished, including my son's senior picture shoot. And the photographer was still smiling! So was I. And yes, we stopped for ice cream (and burgers, and cheese fries)!

Because of preparation and amazing talent from Cioco, here's the end result....

Reminds me of a Pride and Prejudice Background

Nice and Cozy

Eight and Eager!!

Fifteen and Fantastic!

Nineteen and Independent!

Seventeen and Ready for the World!

Ten and Excited about life!

Yes, you do love each other!

I love the ATTITUDE in this pic. Especially, little guy!

20 Years

Three and Precious!

Five and Full of it!

LOVE this!! She finally got up...with help!

My Beauties!

Thirteen and Terrific!

A Lewis and Clark Moment

Little Sis looking up to Big Sis - in so many ways

Nobody will ever know the reason for this snapshot!

My Cool Dudes

My Treasures!!

Yes, I'm happy....I do LOVE the photo results, but that's not my true happiness. Ultimately, happiness comes from having family to love and being loved right back. I love my crew!

Make family photos an important part of your family traditions...'cause you can never go back!

More to Come....but until then, Stick-to-it!

Mother, May I?

Take 10 Baby Steps....

Mother, May I?

Yes, you may!

Oh, Mother, May I...the best childhood game of my memory. Or, maybe it was Dodge Ball by the front door foyer. Either way, I now know why my mother enjoyed playing this game with us. She would sit down, give orders, watch us play (or cry), and declare a winner. No physical energy was used, it provided relaxation, and the children felt they were being entertained. I can definitely relate!

This game has been a part of my children's lives for 20 years. We have resurrected it as of late, and the children beg to play. We did this for our Family Home Evening activity on Monday night. It was nice and cool outside and the sun was going down - the perfect conditions for Mom to sit on the porch rocker with Dad and for my daughter to play Mother.

If you've never played, here are the rules:

All participants line up horizontally on a designated line.

Ready to play! (Everyone is still happy)

 

 The "Mother" is at a designated finish line. 

"Mother" on the front porch steps - the finish line.

Mother calls a person's name and gives them a command. Before acting, the participant must ask, Mother, May I? before proceeding or they have to go back to the starting line. Mother chooses the next person to go in a designated order. Mother chooses what each person is to do. (This generally depends on the age of the child, how far back a child is, especially if they keep returning to the starting line, how close someone is to the finish line, etc.) The first person to reach "Mother" is the winner.

Commands are a random number followed by an action.

Examples:

Take 3 Giant Steps

Take 5 Frog Leaps

Take 2 Hurdle Jumps

Take 4 Scissor Steps 

Take 10 Baby Steps

Take 6 Crawls

Take 4 Bunny Hops

Take 6 Backward Steps

Take 12 Tiptoe Steps

Take 7 Marching Steps

Take 4 Skipping Steps

Remember, if the child does not say, Mother, May I?, he must go back to the starting line, even if he's  almost to the finish line.

Backwards Steps

Certain children are really good at remembering to say, Mother, May I?. However, other children regularly forget, which many times results in tears. We get ornery statements such as , "She cheated or That's not fair or He took too many steps or you were supposed to stop here." Children end up storming off if they have to go back too many times or cry because they didn't win. 

A sad moment

Happy with himself 'cause he remembered to say, "Mother, May I?"

Enjoying her frog leaping abilities. She is PRO at remembering to say, "Mother, May I?"

Fighting for the finish line...

So, why do we keep playing this game? Sometimes I shake my head and declare to myself, this is the last time we play this game! However, we play because the children beg to,even if they end up crying in the end. When I suggest the game, they jump up and down and eagerly get in line. It's a favorite, that's for sure, but the poor sportsmanship, name calling, or making fun of one another is frustrating. Nevertheless, we continue the tradition (passed on from my Mother) and endure and discourage the negative feelings that often times result. We don't give up on Mother, May I?.

Isn't that the same with parenting? No matter how much we try to discourage it, we consistently deal with frustrations, grumps, sadness, yelling, fighting, bickering, quarreling, name calling, and ridicule. Family life is a blessing and can be a most enjoyable and fulfilling experience. But yet, we are impatient with the ones we love the most or are intolerant with our family's bad habits and annoyances. Yet, we keep working at it. We stay the course. We don't give up.

Mother, May I? is a keeper. It's kind of a microcosm of Earth life. We are given commandments and direction from our parents and the Lord. We have our agency and based on the choices we make we either move forward and progress or fall back. But, we can always begin again, just like repentance. And when we reach the finish line, the joy is sweet, reuniting with those we love. 

Now how do get the children to respond with, "Mother, May I?" when I say: take out the trash, take your pile to your room, take your sister to the bathroom, take your plate to the sink or take your sister to the park? 

More to Come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

Follow the Obvious and Swing Higher!

Five Little Monkeys were swinging in a tree...

Teasing Mr. Alligator, "Can't catch me, no, you can't catch me!"

Along comes Mr. Alligator, quiet as can be...

Snap that monkey right out of that tree!

This has to be one of the best ditties ever created! In a way, you could say it's kind of morbid but those stupid monkeys (whoops, I said the S-word) just didn't get the obvious, according to my sweetie-pie 3...

We were in the car yesterday (just the 2 of us), and she was crying because we dropped off her sister and brother and cousin. No, she wasn't crying for her brother or sister, but rather, her cousin. (I hope that makes you feel special, MRH) The tears continued for longer than I could stand, so I whipped out the best trick in the book...the Monkey and Alligator song. No child can resist it. They are captivated by the actions, and the creepiness of the alligator coming, and then the pause.......... before he SNAPS.

She immediately stopped crying and wanted me to do it again and again. 

At the end of the song, I said, "No more monkeys swinging in the tree." 

"Why?", she asked.

I answered: "'Cause the Alligator ate them all."

Without missing a beat, she concluded, "They should have swinged higher."

I laughed and laughed. I was stunned by how quickly she deduced the monkey's folly. Their demise could have been avoided if they just "swinged higher". I told her she was so wise and those monkeys were not very smart. She nodded her head and smiled and was so happy with herself. Our children seem to like it when we laugh at them when they're funny or cute.

I've been thinking about this experience. To a three year old, it was so OBVIOUS why the monkeys were being eaten by the alligator. OK, so I can see maybe one of the monkeys becoming an alligator lunch. But all four? Those last four monkeys should have learned from the first and got a clue to run (or swing) for higher ground (or trees). But, they didn't...and they were toast. 

How does this apply to parenting? Sometimes the obvious is right in front of us, but we don't see it. A simple solution to a problem, a more loving way to discipline, an answer to prayer, a direction to follow, a change that needs to be made is right there but we're distracted or unwilling because of "the same ol' way we've always done it." I feel like I get in the parenting rut and I stick with the same approach or method. Or, due to laziness or fatigue or mood swings or just plain grumpiness, I'm unwilling to move or change to create a better circumstance for all involved. However, if I was willing to "swing a little higher", to change my game plan (avoid getting eaten by the alligator), the result would be better for all involved...more love, kindness, patience, faith and less contention, arguing, frustration, and negativity.

I also thought about looking at the monkeys as our children. We all know the first child is the guinea pig. Poor thing! The parenting alligator's got that one for sure. Hopefully, by the next one and the next one, we'll learn and change and develop, so our parental mistakes will diminish and we'll become wise and gentle.

You could look at the Alligator as the adversary. He wants to get us. If we allow his buffetings to sway us, we get closer to his grasp. But as we swing higher and higher, by following the obvious, we move closer to the safety of the Lord.

I printed these monkeys years ago. I laminated them and put them on popsicle sticks. It's the best prop for a preschool, nursery, primary class, family home evening, or to make a car ride more enjoyable.

And the alligator must be sized proportionately so you get the full effect of how big and scary he is. All the kids want to be the alligator so they can snap the monkeys.

Examples:

My teenager is sad and lonely. Instead of telling her to do her chores or her homework, give her a hug, stroke her hair, and offer some kind words of encouragement. The obvious is right in front of me, but I don't always follow it. Bad monkey!

Our five year old boy is having temper tantrums all of a sudden. Instead of sending him to his room or getting mad right back, follow the obvious - pick him up, rock him back and forth, talk softly, hug him, determine the cause of the tantrum and not react to the outward emotions.

Spontaneity is not my strong point. When a child wants to do a small thing right then, instead of shutting it down, go with it. Give some attention and make them feel important.

Add some creativity, liven things up a bit, add some music, show enthusiasm, give some service, help a child with their chores, sweeten the deal, enjoy the moment.

Oh, the lessons we learn from our children! And thanks to my little girl, I hope to be a smarter monkey going forward!

I love being a Mama!

More to Come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

Opportunities for Spiritual Growth

“As we touch the temple and love the temple, our lives will reflect our faith. As we go to the holy house, as we remember the covenants we make therein, we will be able to bear every trial and overcome each temptation.”

President Thomas S. Monson 

If you want your children to have spiritual experiences, provide opportunities 

that encourage spiritual growth. ~ me

One way to do this is to visit spiritual places. I want my children to be able to bear every trial and overcome each temptation. So, we take them to the temple whenever we go on a trip or oftentimes, in our local town for an evening stroll or family activity. 

Last month we visited Idaho Falls, ID for a choir tour that our older children were participating in. We stopped by the Idaho Fall Temple with our younger half for a "field trip of spiritual strengthening". 

The Snake River runs through downtown Idaho Falls, right past where the temple was built. We enjoyed some time in nature as well.

 

Our little cutie had to have her baby mouse in the picture. My eight year old insisted that I get my picture by the river, too. However, my paranoid Mama state came out (fear of my child falling in the river) so we didn't stay very long. Good thing a certain someone had to go to the bathroom!

Every day It's a decision how we spend our time. Our children get enough worldly entertainment. Thus, we choose to give our children experiences that will build and strengthen their faith. 

Terrific Times in Idaho Falls! We are so looking forward to this and this and this. Woo-Hoo, more spiritual strengthening in the future!!

 More to Come...but until then, Stick-to-it!