A Kudos to Commitment

After nine months of working, working, working and saving, saving, saving, our daughter succeeded in earning the money to travel to Washington DC with her school class for a ten day educational experience. A Kudos goes out to her for making the commitment and fulfilling it. We're so thrilled you had a fantastic time!

A thumbs up for all my hard work...it was worth every minute of it! (Enjoying Colonial Williamsburg in Virginia)

She kept track of her finances using the Stick-to-it Money Management System. Do you have the desire to instill in your children successful money management skills? Learn more here:

http://www.sticktoitcharts.com/MoneyManagement.html

Good job, EE!

More to Come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

Grateful for Super Heroes...and other lessons.

We had the 4th birthday party yesterday. Yes, I may be crazy, but after throwing at least 30 birthday parties for my children, I've learned a few things...

1. Themed birthday parties are for the parents, not the children. Parents put too much pressure on themselves to have the perfect "themed" party. Don't get me wrong...I love having a theme. In fact, I always have a theme. However, it is possible to have a fun "basketball" or "princess" party without a lot of preparation, stress and money. Children really don't care if you spend seven hours making the perfect sleep over cake with fondant made days before. Children don't know the difference between fancy and expensive party favors or the typical balloon, party blower, bouncy ball and a few pieces of candy. Simplify the party. Do the typical games around the theme. Limit your decorations because kids don't really "see them". They're too caught up wanting to play with the toys that are opened or being involved in the games that are played. Usually, they're just happy to go somewhere. You could probably have a house cleaning party and they would be happy. Hey, that's not a bad idea!

This is my favorite party decoration. My son came up with it a few years ago. Attach balloons to your ceiling fan and turn it on low. The children think it's really cool because it's moving! It creates a neat effect with little expense and time invested.

2. Invest in some super heroes! Fortunately, I have plenty of these hanging around. Add in some of their friends and I'm good to go. There is nothing better than putting some teens and preteens to work at the birthday party. They do a great job at maintaining order, running the games, passing out cake, assembling party bags, helping with a craft or taking pictures. Not only does it give Mom a breather, but it gives them a chance to feel needed and to serve. They also learn important skills of managing children, organizing, leading and ...planning parties. They'll have plenty of those in their future! Don't have any older children? Enlist the help of some neighbor kids, a friend's children, nieces or nephews, etc. It's worth it!! They may even dress up for the part...

He couldn't resist trying on one of the birthday boy's new toys. I couldn't resist taking the picture!

Super Heroes get cake and ice cream, too.

No cape and mask for these two!

3. Don't feel like you HAVE to make the cake. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. This time it made more sense to invest in another person's cake-making abilities.

Happy Birthday, sweet boy!

4. Invest in paper products and a cheap plastic table cloth. But, don't spend money on the printed cups and plates and napkins. Kids just want the cake and ice cream. They're not going to go home and tell their mother that the cake was served on boring, white paper plates.

5. At the beginning of the party, have some kind of craft (simple - age appropriate) or coloring page for the children to work on until everyone gets there. Some children may be hesitant to come to the party, so get them involved in something right away!

Of course, a basketball coloring page.

 6. Things I learned at this party: Don't play musical presents with four year olds. They have a very hard time maneuvering the presents and they want to be the one to hand "their present" to the birthday child. Did not go over very well. But, with older children it is very fun. Turn on some upbeat music, have the children sit in a circle and pass the presents around. When the music stops, the birthday child opens the present they're holding. Very fun and it avoids the problem of everyone crowding in to see the birthday child open their presents. This keeps all the children in a circle so all can see. Also, with four year olds, everything goes faster than you think. They get bored easily and want to move quickly to something new. Have more things planned than you think you'll need. Don't be afraid to have some down time and just let them play together.

7. Remember why you're throwing the party. It's for your child, after all; not to impress the other children or their parents. Seeing your sweetheart smile makes it all worth it!

How did you get to be 4 so quickly?

More to come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

Stick-to-it School System - Up and Running

We're happy to announce that our new product is up and running -

The Stick-to-it School System

I've been using this tool for over seven years with my children and we're excited to share it with you. 

Let us know what you think .... I'll let the website catch you up.

www.sticktoitcharts.com

More to come... but until then, Stick-to-it!

You get what you get.....

My six year old daughter had a major fit last night during Family Home Evening "treat time". She felt she didn't get enough candy on her ice cream sundae. Wow! The well known phrase at our house, introduced to us by my wonderful friend, came to mind...

"You get what you get and you don't throw a fit!!!"

I have used this motto for years and I LOVE it. If my kids whine about it, they know what they're going to hear. I think it really comes down to gratitude. Are you grateful for what you did get? Are you thankful that you received some ice cream and it did have some candy on it? Focus on what you did get and be grateful!

No, our ice cream didn't look this fancy. We had hot fudge though, so there!

So, she was told that she could leave the room until she was under control. She got under control right away. There's something about being dismissed that my children just don't like. They WANT to be with the family, and for that, I'm grateful. (I'm also grateful for the extra candy I received ... 'CAUSE I'M THE MOM!!!)

More to come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

Serving = Loving

One of my children brought home this darling reminder from their Primary class on Sunday. (www.mormon.org)

Somebody didn't do their dusting job!

When I see this, I wonder how we can instill more love for each other in our home. How do we avoid the criticism, arguing, quarreling, name calling? One thought may be: by teaching them to serve each other. When we serve others, our love for them grows. Now the key is....how do we teach them to serve one another? Next step...how do we teach them to do it willingly?

I think it starts with the parents being an example. When our children see us serving them with love, joy and happiness, they catch the bug, too. 

When we provide experiences for them to serve, they have the opportunity to feel the joy of service. One of our family service days last year...See those smiles? They're feeling it!

This morning, I happily served my children by waking them up, making them breakfast and packing their lunch; not to mention signing off the homework, checking the math and printing the essay. Hopefully, we'll have some joyful service reciprocated when they come home. Here's to positive and optimistic thinking...and lots of prayers!

More to come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

Kids in the Kitchen

Do you find yourself shooing your kids out of the kitchen when you're preparing a meal? You struggle and get frustrated because you're just trying to finish up and they're at your feet wanting your attention. 

Make dinner and keep them entertained by having them HELP you in the kitchen. Now, I have to be in the right mood for this; a few days ago, I was. NOTE: This was early in the morning and I didn't plan this so everyone's looking grody and the kitchen's a mess. (I love fixing dinner in the crock pot in the morning...makes for a less chaotic afternoon and very quick dinner preparation)

 It all started because SHE wanted to help cut the potatoes. Why not?

Then HE wanted to help, too. Scrubbing potatoes - perfect job for a 4 year old to be.

SHE couldn't be left out. By this time things were going really well. I was keeping my cool.

 My messenger boy. (I hate going down to the pantry)

Time for a new job. Putting the carrots, potatoes and onions IN the crockpot is great fun.

Making breakfast while we make dinner. 
Good Man!

Another great job for the slightly older child - opening the cans with the electric can opener.By the way, things are still under control!

Pouring: a brilliant way to help! (My camera was being weird so sorry for the photo quality.)

Adding the seasonings. Watch this part carefully or you may have a half bottle of pepper dumped into your dinner. Patience level is still high.

Stirring and stirring and stirring the sauce.Watch the speed on the stirring! Slow down a little bit, buddy.

 SUCCESS!!! Happy Mom, Happy Kids, Yummy Dinner!




























More to come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

Big, Fat Question Mark

Look for our new product release coming up 

at the end of this month:

Keep your eye on:  www.sticktoitcharts.com

Kindness Begins with Me

When my children were young, my husband, Sam, came up with a way to help with quarreling, fighting, arguing, bickering and any other synonym you want to use. Instead of sending them to their rooms or putting them in time out, he had them stand up, face each other and sing this song:

Kindness Begins with Me

I want to be kind to everyone; for that is right, you see.

So I say to myself, "Remember This: Kindness Begins with Me".

Here's a link to the actual music where you can hear the tune if you're not familiar with it.

http://lds.org/churchmusic/detailmusicPlayer/index.html?searchlanguage=1&searchcollection=2&searchseqstart=145&searchsubseqstart=b&searchseqend=145&searchsubseqend=b

I'm grateful for this little tradition. It started over ten years ago and can still be heard in our house, today. Yes, my kids think it's goofy. My teenagers just roll their eyes and suffer through it. My little ones love it and are more than anxious to sing it. My pre-teens about die. There's something about music that soothes the soul and softens the heart.

No doubt they will always remember this little song and let's hope they really internalize the meaning. Who knows, maybe their children will be singing it... when that day comes.

Treasure those feeling of love and kindness in your home. Oh, if we could just bottle them up and let them go when the grumps come around.

Here's one moment I'd bottle up for future release!

More to come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

Take a Number

How many requests did I fulfill yesterday? How many tasks did I complete? How many needs did I meet? There is no way to keep track...but it was A LOT!!!!! Afternoon/evening is crazy at our home. EVERYONE wants Mom's attention and EVERYONE wants it at the same time. 

"Mom, can you help me with my memorization?"
"Mom, I don't understand this math."
"Will you read me this book?"
"Guess what happened in Spanish today?"
"Can I go to my friend's house?"
"Honey, can you help me with something?"
"Mommy, sippy?"
"Mommy, I can spell tractor."

"Mommy, what is this?"

"Mom, can you get me my towel?"

"What do I use for my hair?"

"Can you print this out?"

Wow! I'm tempted to instigate a numbering system. 

 

Everytime I hear "Mom", I'll respond with "Take a Number". I'll install one of those ugly DMV numbering screens, and I'll sit at the counter and fulfill requests. No talking out of turn, no butting in front of someone else! No more whining that this person or that person interrupted or "I was first"! Wait for your number and then your next number and then your next number. How many numbers would I go through? Hey, that's a way to figure out all the requests I fulfill each day!

In all seriousness, it does get overwhelming. I feel like calling, "Calgon....take me away." 

But honestly, I wouldn't have it any other way!

Bring on the requests...I'm ready!

More to come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

Terrific or Terrible: It's all the way you look at it

To me, it's terrific. To the world, it's terrible. What am I talking about? The terrific (or terrible) twos. I learned this philosophy from James Dobson of Focus on the Family. He refers to the two year old stage as the Terrific Twos!

Sure, some days it feels terrible but for the most part it is terrific! My sweet two year old is a sponge - soaking up EVERYTHING. She loves to look at books; in doing so, she asks what each item is. She repeats everything we say, even the not-so-nice words that my other children say. It's all about discovery; a terrific time for their bodies to grow, their minds to expand and their independence to shine.

Soaking up life!

My daughter has learned in just the last few months to get herself undressed, get herself redressed, maneuver each variety of shoe on and off, wash up after meal time, move an item over to the front door to stand on so she can unlock the door (YIKES!), climb up onto the bar and push buttons on the microwave, start the dishwasher, buckle her carseat, and so much more.

I love the hugs and the cute facial expressions and the new words she's learning. I don't love the fact that she just threw all of my filing off the table and onto the floor or when she jumps into the bath water with her pajamas on. I try to remember: she's learning and exploring and discovering. It's all the way you look at it - attitude is everything. Enjoy the Terrific Two's while they last!

Make Sure it's Worth it!!

Does the entertainment industry just drive you crazy? When your children want to go see a movie with their friends, do you cringe because you know there's not going to be ANYTHING good enough to see? Yes, there is the rare "great film" that comes out, but most of them are not worth my time, nor my money. 

I've learned to rely on this website to help me with my movie-viewing decisions:

http://www.pluggedin.com/ developed by Focus on the Family - www.family.org 

Choose a movie - a new release or an older film and it gives you the DETAILS so you may make an informed decision about whether or not to see the movie, not just rely on your neighbor or friend that said, "It's so great" or "It doesn't really have any swearing" or "There's just a little bit of violence". 

It gives you positive elements, negative elements, sexual content, violent content, drug/alcohol content, crude/profane language and other elements. It tells you how many instances of a swear word there are, quotes from the movie, and descriptions of inappropriate scenes; followed up by an "opinion" as to whether or not to spend your money or time.

I use this website often. I've used it so much that my children now go to the website and read the review before they ask if they can go see it. Or, they email me the review so I can read it myself. 

With my older two children, we've moved to a different approach. We want them to make the decisions for themselves...it's not much longer before they're on their own and we want them to have practice making choices with guidance from those who love them. We tell them to read the review. If they feel good about it, then we let them make the choice. However, we've put our foot down with Rated R movies - not allowed! It's worked well.

My son wanted to go see Avatar. He read the review. I asked him, "What do you think?" He said, "I don't think I should see it. I'll suggest something different". They didn't see a movie after all. They participated in another activity which I would much prefer. 

Help your children choose their media wisely! Find great movies or a TV series to watch as a family and to find enjoyment in. The latest series we've been enjoying is Sue Thomas, F.B.Eye. It's about a deaf lady who works for the FBI, solving cases using her lip reading ability. It's fabulous! No swearing, no sexuality. It's funny and entertaining and exciting. 

Purchase it from AFA: http://store.afa.net/p-10000558-sue-thomas-fbeye-complete-5-volume-set.aspx

Learn more about the true story of Sue Thomas:

 http://suethomasfbeye.com/default.aspx

My movie philosophy: If you're going to watch it, make sure it's worth it.

More to come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

Hatchets and Balloons: Simple Pleasures

I believe in simple (and inexpensive) pleasures. Why do parents feel the need to buy expensive gadgets for their children when they can find joy in simple, everyday things?

We went camping over Labor Day weekend. We brought a few boxes of firewood with us and a small hatchet to cut the wood. Little did I know that this hatchet or "simple pleasure" would be a source of hours of entertainment for five awesome boys who are just a few years away from being young men. Not only fun, but the older brothers and fathers used it as a teaching moment; they took the opportunity to teach proper hatchet safety and care. (Yes, that sounds kind of cheesy, but it's true!)

Future Paul Bunyon

Looking for more wood to chop

Yes, all hatchet fun was done under adult supervision

In your dreams, buddy. No chopping for you...yet

Another example: birthdays for young children. All they care about is the balloons and the wrapping paper...

Look at that smile...how much happier could she be?

... and the boxes...

What a cute little dolly!

Parents can have simple pleasures, too. I know one of mine...watching my sweet little two year old practicing to be a mother one day.

Happy Birthday, Baby!

More to Come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

Lessons from the Soccer Stars

My daughter's final soccer game of the season was last night. (Yes, you do hear a bit of rejoicing between the lines.) Being the Mom that I am, I brought the camera to try and document her soccer season; leave it to me to wait until the final game, but that's beside the point.

Lessons I learned from watching the "Soccer Stars":

1. Cheering for one another not only makes those we're cheering for feel good, but it's healthy for our own soul as well. Cheer for your kids with sincerity and love. And while you're at it, cheer for yourself. As Julie B. Beck says, "You're doing better than you think you are."

2. If we're too rigid and uptight, the ball just might pass us by. How does this apply to raising kids? If we're so focused on the rules, and the letter of the law when it comes to being a parent, we miss the sweet moments that parenting brings. 

 3. Find joy in the journey. When the pressure's on in life (when is it not?), take the time to play pat-a-cake. Fun, laughter and play are essential building blocks to a health family.

4. Tongues and gum bring a lot of joy. It's the little things in life that matter. Look for those simple things in your life that bring you joy and write them down. As Henry B. Eyring says, "Have I seen the hand of God reaching out to touch us or our children or our family today?”

5. Hug eachother. Hug them in the morning. Hug them at night. Hug them when they're sad or mad. Often times, they just need some extra attention and love when things aren't going their way. A hug from someone you love can "carry" you through the weeds and into the flowers.

6. Friends (and treats) keep us going. Contact a friend from your past or one you haven't been in touch with lately. Reminisce, remember and renew. Relationships are too precious to pass us by. Share a treat while you're at it!

Thanks, Soccer Stars, for teaching me, too. Congrats on a fun season!!

More to come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

Do they REALLY know?

We're making big financial moves in our house....our oldest daughter opened up her own checking account! Note to self: my daughter is going to kill me for posting this, but my kids know I reserve this picture taking/posting right as their mother - the one who has fed them, clothed them, nurtured them, loved them! 

I took pictures of her writing her first check; I couldn't resist. However, I opted not to post the one showing the completed check due to possible identity theft.

"Mom, please....must you?"

We've had several training sessions about balancing a check book, where to write the transactions on the register, bouncing checks (not that she has - just warnings), what's a deposit?, saving receipts, "I have a cool pin number", all about interest, debit vs. credit, etc. Truthfully, it surprised me that she had so many questions about the whole process. I guess I "assumed" that she knew all the details from watching, hearing, observing, discussing over the years. First lesson - never assume. Make sure they REALLY  know, whether it be taking care of their finances, memorizing their multiplication facts or how to properly clean a bathroom or brush their teeth. (Or, how to properly aim - just dealt with that accident)

And when it comes to finances, take the time to chat with your kids. Teach and train them NOW so they'll have the knowledge and experience under your roof. Then when they're under their own roof, they'll be a little more prepared. And hopefully, they'll avoid the bounced checks and go for debit instead of credit.

If you need some assistance or want a hands-on approach, try the Stick-to-it Money Management System - www.sticktoitcharts.com

More to come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

Down Time

Sometimes kids need a little down time...and a chance to play on big brother's game boy (or whatever it's called) when he's at school.

The 3 Amigos

More to Come, but until then, Stick-to-it!

Seeds of Opportunity

So, my little boy doesn't like toys. Well, that's not entirely true. He'll play with a sword or a nerf gun or some dress up clothes; maybe a toy car once in a while. Generally, he's not one of those boys who dies for a train set or will line up the army men and bulldoze them over with the closest dump truck. What does he like to do....?

Mom's Best Helper

...help Mom. He wants to crack the eggs, mix the biscuits, decorate the cupcakes, or clean the counter with half a bottle of 409. This time it was "scoop the seeds". This provided an enormous amount of entertainment for this almost four year old. Not only that, he feels needed and he's learning a skill. Keep an eye out for those "seeds" of opportunity and take advantage of them! Just look out for flying cantaloupe!

Across the Bar and Onto the Floor

More to come...but until then, Stick-to-it!

Ahhh, Sweet Words!

Picture This: 16 year old boy comes home from school on a Friday afternoon. He was invited to hang out with some of his friends before the school dance. He tells them, "No, I have some lawns to mow and some chores to do. When I finish, I'll give you a call." How refreshing it is to hear the sweet words, "No".

Coming from the mouth of this guy...it's glorious! Why? 

He's making a choice to "stick" to his responsibilities. Love it!! 

Now, coming from the mouth of this little darlin'...it's a different story.

"No" isn't always a negative answer. It's all perspective, isn't it?

More to Come...but until then, Stick-to-it!