A few weeks ago, I was mad. It doesn't happen very often but that day somebody really set me off, more so than I've ever felt in a LONG time. I'm sure a lot of it was my fault - over sensitive and quick to be offended. Nevertheless, I was ticked. I looked for some way to take out my anger. I didn't want to yell at my children or punch out a picture frame (sorry, Kath) so I looked around the house and saw a messy kitchen. I went to work...
For some reason, the kitchen is the family dumping ground. I started chucking my children's stuff into the living room. My oldest two children were working on their homework. They quickly got the picture. They picked up their things and put them away. The news spread quickly that Mom was upset so everyone started doing their chores. I guess when Mom is mad and silent, it's more effective than being mad and yelling.
Back to cleaning: I swept the floor, moving the kitchen table, benches and bar stools out of the way.
I mopped the floor. I even sprayed the edges of the floor and scrubbed the built up dirt that never gets clean with just a mop. I sprayed and wiped the base boards, the walls and all of the kitchen appliances. I cleaned the cupboard doors and the outside of the garbage can. I scrubbed the table, all of the chairs, benches, and bar stools. I moved on to the living room and cleaned the pencil and crayon designs off the walls and then down the stair well to do the same thing. I put all my energy into cleaning and I didn't stop until my anger had dissipated, or in other words, until the grumps were gone.
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| No, this is not what my broom looks like. I just liked the photo. |
When I was finished, I was so hot and sweaty. Wow! I felt better though, and now, looking back, there are many advantages of cleaning when you're mad...
1. The places that don't get cleaned very often, are suddenly spotless.
2. Instead of wallowing in your self pity, something gets accomplished.
3. It's a good work out! Lose some calories while you let off some steam.
4. Take your frustrations out on the kitchen floor instead of your family.
5. You may get other people involved, too and then more gets done.
6. You end up counting your blessings and forget why you were mad in the first place.
7. You repent for getting upset and apologize to the family (especially for chucking their stuff). Even mothers make mistakes and it's good for children to hear you say, "SORRY!".
8. A nice hot shower awaits you...it may be the second shower of the day. Nice! Now you get to meditate, pray, think and RELAX!
9. Hopefully there's an apology and life can move on.
10. You walk into the kitchen to fix dinner and you're loving how clean everything is!!!
No, I'm not happy with myself for getting upset, but I really feel that how you handle your anger is the important part. One public speaker said he runs down to the water heater and hugs it to avoid yelling at his family. Also, we choose to get mad or upset so we also choose how we're going to deal with it. Ever upset with a difficult child? (hah, do I need to even ask?) Try sitting them down on the couch and just hugging them. Don't say anything. Just hug them and see what happens. Hug them for one minute, five minutes, ten minutes. Frustrations soften and love builds up. Now I like that kind of build-up!
More to Come...but until then, Stick-to-it!
I've done that before. It's a good reminder that I need to use again. Thanks Julie!
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