No matter how much you love your children, you need a break. No, you're not abandoning your children if you go out of town for a few days and leave them with Grandma. You're not a bad mother for wanting an evening with Dad. Get a babysitter and get out of the house!
It's healthy to have time alone with your spouse. It's rejuvenating to think about other things rather than changing diapers, what's for dinner?, Mikey needs to go to soccer practice, the car payment is due or five loads of laundry need to be folded. Take a break from all the worry and spend time together!
Sam and I go out at least once a week. Some weeks we make it twice and those are fabulous times! After being stuck at home for two weeks taking care of children with strep throat and hives, I was just dying to get out. I asked the older children to "maintain order" (code for babysit) and we went out for just an hour to get a shake and talk about life. It made all the difference! Our usual outings include dinner (a MUST) and then walking, shopping or reading. For special occasions we'll see a play or musical. We enjoy going out with friends, too! We tend to stay away from movies because first, there's rarely anything good to see and secondly, you can't talk to each other.
Yes, if you don't have older children who can "hold down the fort" (another code), it makes things more difficult. Our first two children were 17 months apart, followed by our third 26 months later. #4 came 25 months later. At one point we had four children under six and it was CRAAZZYYY but it was AWESOME! We didn't take the time to go out much since babysitters are expensive (we're blessed with eternal treasures, not worldly treasures). However, there are ways to be creative and get the time you need. Trade babysitting with a friend who has young children, too. It's a great way to get out weekly for BOTH parties and the children have fun playing with some friends. My brother and his wife have a babysitting co-op in their neighborhood. I think it's a great idea..I'll get more info and do a post about that. (Reminder to self) Get the children to bed early (easier said than done) and have a date at home. Don't just watch TV. Do something unique and special. Or, get up early and have a special breakfast together. Take the children to the park and have a "date" on the park bench. Whatever you do, do something. I will admit, we rejoiced, truly we did, when our oldest child was able to babysit. Now we have four children old enough to be the "head honcho". Honestly, I never thought the time would come...but it does.
Sam is great about encouraging us to go out of town once or twice per year. When he suggests it I always say, "Oh, it's not good timing, so and so has this, who will watch the kids, it's too expensive to go...". Excuses, excuses. I have the guilty mother syndrome. Once the logistics are secured and everything is worked out (which it always does work out), I'm soooooo grateful for the time away. Usually, it's just for a day or two, but we always count the hours (literally) and savor them.
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| 31 Hours... |
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| Approximately 72 hours... |
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| 3 hours...hey, 3 hours is 3 hours |
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| 60 Hours or so... |
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